Happy Thanksgiving
Let's welcome Advent with some little discounts!
On Sunday, December 1st, like many of you, our family will gather around the wreath, the kids will bicker over who gets the matches, and we will light the first candle of Advent, traditionally representing hope.
I have been writing and speaking a lot about hope. Freud would have called it my supervalent thought.
Hope.
How can I live with greater hope? Is it even realistic to have a goal of increasing hope?
In the psychology literature, goals are best when they are measurable, achievable, specific, relevant, and time-bound. They have to have a clear outcome that can be measured. They have to be realistic and in line with other goals and systems. A good goal also follows some specific timeline. The vague and subjective goal of keeping your room tidy is made better by smaller goals: Make the bed every day as soon as you get up, keep dirty clothes in the laundry basket, do laundry every Saturday morning, empty the trash can when trash meets the rim, put shoes in the closet nightly before bed, etc.
Having temporal goals is good for our discipline, and can be a good model for discipline in our spiritual life. We can set specific measurable, achievable, and spiritual goals such as a daily rosary, weekly mass, monthly confession, evening examination, & daily mental prayer, and not see the spiritual rewards. These spiritual disciplines may help us achieve the more vague spiritual goal of growing in holiness, but doing all the right stuff can sometimes be a routine or exercise.
And this is where Hope comes in.
“Hope is the theological virtue by which we desire the kingdom of heaven and eternal life as our happiness, placing our trust in Christ's promises and relying not on our own strength, but on the help of the grace of the Holy Spirit” (CCC 1817).
Hope isn’t about us. It doesn't exist because of anything we are doing (although if we are living in sin it is difficult for any of the virtues to abound). Although we can nurture it, Hope isn't something we can control. It flourishes when we surrender all control. Hope requires emptying our desires for anything other than the Kingdom of Heaven and eternal happiness. It deepens our trust and abdication to the grace of the Holy Spirit. It is an orientation of our hearts, whereby we are lifted out of the muck in this life and can set our hearts on eternal happiness.
In essence, hope is a longing for what we do not have. We experience hope precisely when we lack that which we desire.
St. Paul reminds us
“Now hope that is seen is not hope.
For who hopes for what he sees?
But if we hope for what we do not see,
we wait for it with patience.”
(Romans 8:24-25)
If we already had hope, we would express gratitude, not hope. Within hope, there exists an element of longing—not for temporal goods, but for spiritual oneness and completeness found solely in the Lord. It requires a spiritual detachment from those good earthly goals - those which are tangible, measurable, achievable, and timebound, for exactly the opposite. Hope is set on the eternal, intangible, unmeasurable, and completely unachievable without the Grace of the Holy Spirit.
Next week we enter into our first week of Advent and begin with the spirit of Hope. If you are local, I invite you to consider joining me, Nell O’Leary, Sister Maria Kim, and other women in Scottsdale to ponder living a life Abounding in Hope. Nell and I will each speak for an hour, we will celebrate mass together with Bishop Olmstead, have time for silent adoration and confession, and have a panel Q/A as we strive to take the philosophical and theological and make it practical for transformational experience. Register before December 2nd! Information about upcoming events can be found on my website. I would love to see you in person!
If you can't attend, please seek to find some way this Advent to immerse yourself in prayer, reflection, and community as you journey toward the joy of Christ’s coming this Christmas.
Keep your hearts patiently set on the eternal, live a life that abounds in Hope!
In honor of Thanksgiving and that black Friday shopping here are some links and discounts…
I haven’t yet taken my book Daughter by Design off the website (here) so I am offering you another coupon good through the weekend. Use coupon code Grateful24 for $5 off each book and free shipping as always!
If you are looking for great Catholic gifts consider supporting the shops at Someday Saints, ChewsLife, and Blessed is She. You can use my affiliate link (here) and enter coupon code MaryRuth10 for an additional 10% off at Blessed is She. Be sure to check out their Advent book on Hope - search for Advent and all the options will pop up. They are having a great sale right now!
My Favorites…
From SomedaySaints - I love their stickers!!
From ChewsLife, I am obsessed with these wrap rosaries… and so are my teens!
And pretty much everything at Blessed is She. I can’t wait to get this little gift wrapped and under the tree!
But most importantly, remember the gift of YOU this year. Your time, presence, and attention are the best gifts of all! I am counting my blessings and sending prayers of gratitude for YOU this Thanksgiving. Thanks for being a part of my life!